How Much Does A Matchmaker Cost?
I shared how much a particular matchmaking client's search cost on Twitter.
The post went viral. Over 5 million views in 72 hours.
It reminded me how most people have no idea how much matchmaking costs, especially because many matchmaking services obscure their prices online.
Today, we'll cover exactly how much it costs to hire a matchmaking service in 2026, including:
- The tiers of service, and why high-end matchmakers cost so much more than "concierge" matchmakers
- Pricing for many popular matchmaking services, based on what my clients have reported from shopping around
- What is, and isn't, usually included in the price of a matchmaking service
- How much my matchmaking service costs (spoiler alert: it starts at $35,000) and what influences the price
Before we dive in...
I'm Blaine Anderson, and I'm a professional matchmaker and dating coach for men.
You might recognize me from the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Shark Tank (Mark Cuban offered me a deal on Season 15) or social media, where >1 million people follow me for dating tips.
Anyway, without further ado...
An Introduction To How Much Matchmaking Costs
At a high level, matchmaking services generally fall into one of three pricing and service tiers.
Tier 1: $5,000 - $15,000 Matchmaking Services
There are three mainstream services that compete at this price point: Tawkify, Three Day Rule, and It's Just Lunch.
Matchmaking services in the $5,000 to $15,000 range are entry-level offerings, where as a client, you'll often receive ~5x matches from an existing database of singles over the course of ~3 months.
Basically, your matchmaker isn't pounding the pavement to find matches for you personally at this price point. Other constraints may apply (e.g. Tawkify dates are blind!)
Customer experience and satisfaction depends heavily on your individual matchmaker.
Tier 2: $25,000 - $150,000 Matchmaking Services
This tier of service includes corporate matchmakers like Selective Search and Kelleher International, as well as boutique matchmaking services like mine.
Matchmaking services in the $25,000 to $150,000 range are increasingly converging around an “unlimited dates” format, over a term of 4 to 12 months. You trust your matchmaker to propose 1 to 2 matches you’ll like per month.
Matches in this tier of service are sourced for clients personally, if bigger players can quietly lean on databases they’ve built over time.
Specific pricing typically depends on the complexity of the client's search. That's a fancy way of saying that the more work the matchmaker expects to have to do to set you up, the more expensive your package will be:
- Looking for someone attractive, but don't have crazy requirements, and tend people you're into tend to be into you back? Your search shouldn't be wildly expensive.
- Looking for someone unusual, or otherwise have tricky search requirements? Struggle to attract the types of people you want to date? Your search will be more expensive.
Anyway, customer experiences and results tend to be stronger in this tier of service versus the entry-level services, but these vary.
Review your contract closely. Some matchmakers talk big game, and guarantee basically nothing.
Tier 3: >$150,000 Matchmaking Services
This tier of matchmaker includes services like Patti Stanger's and pricing can range from $150,000 to over $1,000,000.
The matchmakers here are boutiques, and their businesses are largely referral-based. For example, your friend found his wife through the matchmaker, and that helps justify the >$150,000 price point to you.
These services often look similar to the services in the $25,000 to $150,000 range in terms of what they offer and guarantee, though they often work on longer-term engagements (e.g. year-long search) and they often work with an older (read: wealthier) clientele.
Customer experiences and results should be stronger here than the other services, because a matchmaker can devote serious resources toward a client’s search with a multi-six-figure budget. But review your contract closely to understand what you're actually guaranteed!
How Much Matchmaking Services Actually Cost
How Much My Matchmaking Service Costs
Dating By Blaine offers just one tier of matchmaking service, where we go out and find amazing matches for our clients, and that starts at $35,000.
The exact price of a search depends on the factors I outlined in the last section, but the biggest variable is how difficult I expect a client's search to be.
- Looking for a woman I don't have to jump through hoops to find, who's likely to reciprocate your interest? Your matchmaking search will be closer to $35,000.
- Looking for a woman who's challenging to find, and may not want to meet you back? Your matchmaking search will cost significantly more than $35,000!
Our matchmaking packages typically include professional photos, and often include professional styling as needed. It should go without saying that you pay for your own dates (and clothes if we include styling with your package!)
How Much Other Matchmaking ServiceS Cost
I've not conducted extensive research on competing services' prices, but here are price ranges for matchmaking services that my clients have shared with me recently:
- Tawkify: $5,000 - $15,000
- Three Day Rule: $6,000 - $25,000
- Luma Matchmaking: ≥$15,000
- Selective Search: ≥$50,000
- Kelleher International: ≥$30,000
- Linx Dating: ≥$75,000
- Janis Spindel: $200,000
Don't treat this information as canonical. Prices can vary dramatically based on several factors, which we'll cover next.
Why Do Matchmaking Prices Vary So Much?
You probably intuited this out already, but the factors that impact the price of a matchmaking engagement include...
1. Search Style
Is your matchmaker delivering matches from an existing database? Or is your matchmaker proactively meeting singles they could introduce you to?
The latter costs a lot more than the former.
2. Your Background
No two matchmaking searches are identical, and a client's traits and criteria can dramatically influence the amount of time and effort required to make great introductions.
For example, it's typically much harder to find beautiful single women in San Francisco than New York City, so similar clients looking for similar matches may pay more for matchmaking in San Francisco than they would in New York.
3. Package Terms
The specific terms of your matchmaking package may also influence the price. For example, the longer your search, and the more guarantees a matchmaker makes (e.g. a minimum number of introductions), typically the more expensive the service will be.
Some higher-end matchmakers structure their packages to include certain success-based milestones (e.g. $50,000 payment if you get engaged to someone you meet) but most matchmaking services just cost one flat price.
4. Extras Included
Most higher-end matchmaking services will include services like professional styling and photos with their packages, which is another reason their engagements cost more. But what specifically is included in your package will depend on who you're working with and what you negotiate!
How Payments Work When Hiring A Matchmaker
Most matchmakers' services are paid for in full, upfront, before services begin. Payment is typically made via bank transfer because of the large amounts involved.
Matchmakers typically include the costs of professional styling, photos, and any other services they offer (e.g. coaching) in the upfront price of their package to avoid nickel-and-diming you down the road.
I've heard of low-end matchmaking services offering "pay as you go" plans, but this is unusual, because pricing plays a useful screening function for most matchmakers (i.e. if you can't afford to pay in full, matchmaking probably isn't for you).
Success-Based Matchmaking services
Potential clients occasionally ask if I offer success-based matchmaking services (e.g. client only pays once they get married or engaged).
Nobody reputable in the matchmaking industry offers fully success-based services, for a few reasons:
- Some singles are delusional, and are seeking a partner who either doesn't exist, or doesn't want them back; and matchmakers can't always predict whether a client's goals are reasonable or not.
- Matchmaking is labor intensive, most matchmakers run small businesses, and they can't front salaries for their teams for months in hopes of an uncertain future payout
- No matchmaker can guarantee you a wife, because most factors that determine whether a match will become your long-term partner are outside your matchmaker's control.
Anyway, some high-end matchmaking services will negotiate success bonuses in their contracts (e.g. client pays $100,000 if they marry someone the matchmaker introduces them to) but this isn't an industry standard by any means.
In general, you're only on the hook financially for whatever you agree to pay for matchmaking services upfront.
Matchmaking Search "Pauses"
Most high-end matchmaking services will include a certain amount of "pause" time with a client's engagement.
The pause time enables the client to pursue an exclusive relationship with a match, without cutting into the active search window the matchmaker agreed to.
For example, my matchmaking packages typically include 6 months of active search, and up to 3 months of pause time.
I'll share a recent NYC client's journey to illustrate how the pause time can be useful:
- The client's first match was a hit, and he started dating the woman we introduced him to exclusively!
- For better or for worse, that relationship ended on good terms after about 4 months.
- We'd only spent about 2 weeks searching for the client's first match, and the client "paused" his search for 3 months while he was dating the woman we introduced him to.
- Therefore the client still had ~4.5 months of active search left (6 months we agreed to, minus 0.5 months already used, minus 1 month beyond the 3 months of pause time he used while dating his first match)
Time is money, and some matchmakers may be willing to accommodate additional pause time for an additional fee.
Regardless, make sure you talk to your matchmaker about how much pause is included with their service before signing up!
Matchmaking Cancellations and Refunds
Different services offer different cancellation and refund policies.
- On one hand, most services offer some sort of refund policy (e.g. if your matchmaker really screws up, you can get some money back...)
- On the other hand, most services aren't eager to give out refunds, so terms and conditions will typically apply!
Refund policies can vary dramatically between services, so be sure to understand your matchmaker's refund policy before signing up.
It should go without saying, but if a matchmaker finds your person before your package has ended (e.g. you would be entitled to more services if you hadn't entered into an exclusive relationship), you probably won't receive a refund!
How TO Compare Matchmaking Quotes
Since different matchmaking services' prices and offerings can vary dramatically, you want to make an apples-to-apples comparison between services before deciding which matchmaker to move forward with.
The most important terms to compare are:
- Will the matchmaker go out and find matches for me personally, or just pull matches from an existing database?
- What exactly counts as an introduction, or match?
- How many introductions are promised, and within what timeframe?
- Who will actually conduct my search?
- What is included in the total price (e.g. photos, styling, etc)?
- What happens if the promised service isn’t delivered?
- What happens if I meet someone early and want to pause?
Is Matchmaking Worth It?
Whether matchmaking is worth it depends on your background and goals:
- Matchmaking is expensive due to the labor-intensive nature of the service, so matchmaking is only "worth it" for well-to-do singles who can comfortably afford it.
- No matchmaker can guarantee a wife or husband, which makes the point about finances even more important. If you'd seriously miss the money in the event of an unsuccessful search, matchmaking isn't worth it.
- Matchmaking solves a specific problem (i.e introductions to high-quality singles) and won't help you if you're not genuinely ready to go on dates, or be in a relationship.
For a more thoughtful take on the topic, check out my article, Is Matchmaking Worth It?
FAQs About Matchmaking Service Prices
Here are a few questions people ask me about matchmaking pricing that we haven't covered already:
Do Women And Men Pay The Same Amount For Matchmaking Services?
Many matchmakers specialize in working with either male or female paying clients. For example, I only work with male clients, and:
- My male clients pay for my team's matchmaking services
- The service is free for women we introduce to our clients
Different matchmakers do things differently. For example, I've heard of matchmakers charging women to be a part of their database of potential matches for male clients.
This is nominally advantageous (only women who are serious about finding a relationship will bother to pay) but the types of women my clients want to meet aren't likely to pay for matchmaking (they have a lot of options!) so that's not how we do things.
Can You Pay for A Single Introduction?
Typically no. Most reputable matchmakers only work with clients on a longer-term, retainer basis.
Does Paying More Lead To Better Results?
This is an interesting question.
On one hand, expensive matchmaking services tend to be able to command higher prices because they have reputations for excellence.
On the other hand, I've worked with a number of clients who've shared horror stories about paying other matchmakers hundreds of thousands of dollars for crap service.
I would hazard there's some relationship between the price of a service and its quality, but it's a tenuous relationship at best.
My recommendation would be to ignore price as a quality-signaling mechanism when shopping around. Assuming you can comfortably afford the service, what matters most is how much you trust your matchmaker!
Next Steps
If you read this far, we should probably chat about working together already!
Tap here to apply to work together. I'd love to help you find your person ♥️